Abnormal psychology

This past week we have been learning about abnormal psychology. I think it is both fascinating but also very scary. It scares me that you wouldn't have any control over your brain and you do things that you would never really do if you were with your full senses. It must be extremely scary for a person living with a mental disorder and never fully trusting yourself.

We have watched a few movies this week and to be honest, the were sort of upsetting, the first one with the mom who just drowned all her five children in the bathtub, and was completely aware of what she'd done. And the day after, then the husband stands and says that "It's hard, but I support my wife." That just make me question whether he is completely healthy or not, I just cannot understand how you can say that. the day after your five kids were killed.

The movie about the mother with multiple personalities was also very weird. I think that there must be a way for her to deal with all her pain and grief, it is in there somewhere, she shows that with her other personalities that are fully aware of what she have gone through. I'm sure that they have tried that, but at the same time it is in there somewhere and I think that therapy could help her get through that.

I am truly impressed by people who stands by and creates families with people with mental disorders, and then I mean the really aggressive ones, like those the persons in the videos had. Even though I know that it is no fault, and love conquers a lot, I still don't think I could do that. Because in that moment when a person turns into someone else, I don't know, but to support someone that really isn't your husband or wife, and support their actions, I don't think I could do that. But, I am also not really a person to judge, because I have no idea about how it would be and what life for those persons are.

brain disorders

So this week I've mostly learned about brain disorders, at least that's the only thing I can remember now, an hour before the weekly blog is due (good work Amanda!). My project was on Synesthesia,  a disorder that makes your senses completely cross wired. For example, you see a square and you smell raspberries. Or you eat chicken and see green. It's interesting that it's even called a disease, from what I've understand, people who have this wouldn't want to get rid of it and it actually seems sort of fun. They see life from a more vivid perspective. Other than Synesthesia, we've talked about Alzheimer's, autism and Parkinson.

To live with a brain disorder must be one of the hardest thing to do, there is really no room in society for people with extra need. They have to go through every day and dealing with all these different problems that for people without a disorder can't eve imagine. What's scary about them is that there is no cure and there is not enough research for something to change peoples lives yet.

Something I think is extra interesting is that autism is a spectrum disorder. How can you really now when someone is suffering from a brain disease? We all have faults, and not all of them are functional, I mean, I am just too shy and that makes me end up in situations that make my life harder than if I would just relax a bit more. My point is, we all have some faults and I'm sure that if someone really wanted to, then everyone could be diagnosed with something.

Can we trust ourselves?

So this week we talked a lot about memory. I think it's very interesting, because the brain is so complex but still very easy to trick. Something that really caught my attention is that we always change our memories. For example, I have a memory (that I first remembered a couple years ago); I must be around five years old and my parents are going to a wedding, it's my mom's cousin Peter's wedding. They drop me off in the woods, which I know is the wood you pass by when you go through our relatives cottage, and then they leave me there, crying. I think I am meeting up with my grandparents, but I can't remember if I ever met them or not. This of course is not true, my parents would never just leave me in the woods like that and they would not leave me crying either. Also, another proof that this is incorrect is that my brother is not even in this memory, and by the age of five and three we would definitely be at the same place.However, they did go to this wedding and I weren't allowed to come and as I said, the forest isn't something I've made up because it's something I have seen for real when we go to our relatives.

My theory is that I was disappointed that I was not allowed to come to the wedding, but then I forgot about it. Later on something in my mind must have triggered this memory. I then think that I dreamt about this, and had a very vivid dream. Sometimes I have a hard time to remember if it was a dream or if it was reality. So, by dreaming this and getting this image in my unconscious I started to believe that this was actually reality. I guess it's like using imagination inflation, but using it on a feeling that I already had and just made up the memory around it.

But even know, when I know that this memory is not real, it doesn't change the fact that I still see this as a memory. It is so clear and vivid to my that it can't just be something I made up because my mind really thinks that I did experience it. So whit that pointed out, how can we know what's real and what's not? How much can we really trust our memories? I guess, with the way science is going, in a few years we will have the answer to that in a few years.

The psychological story about the party

It was a cold windy Friday night that I saw it (optical lobe). It was a line of cars, all filled with my friends that were driving by my house with loud music pumping out from the windows. They were all chatting loudly, laughing and it look to me like they were having the time of their life. This made me feel very sad and left out (amygdala), why would all my friends be going somewhere without me? I could feel my heart racing (autonomic nervous system) and I clench my fists (parietal lobe). Maybe it was just a coincidence I told myself, why would they all decide to just leave me out of all of this. While I stood there reasoning (frontal lobe) with myself, I a paper all of a sudden blew up in my face. I grabbed it and read. It was an invitation, to a party. Tonight. The headline said "Biggest party of the year! You better be there!" The date was written in some cryptically way. It was a math puzzle, I quickly solved it in my head (left hemisphere), and was hardly surprised when I realised that the party was tonight.
     All of a sudden I just felt very tired (pons), remembering (hippocampus) as a child how my family once forgot to bring me food when they'd all gone out for dinner. This had always left a scar in my heart and I was never able to get over it. ¨
   All this worrying had made me really thirsty (hypthalamus) so I went to the refrigerator. I opened the door just a little bit to fast, I lost my balance (cerebellum) and swayed for a second to long. Luckily, with the help of the door, I managed to stay on my feet. I searched (central nervous system) the refrigerator for something to drink, but there was only food in there. I closed my eyes (somatic nervous system) and sighed.
   "No," I thought, "I can't just sit here and feel sorry for myself." I took my coat and jumped in the car. I was going to this party, invitation or not. I needed to know what was going on tonight. Maybe a little impulsive (right hemisphere), but hey, this was killing me! I arrieved to the place where the invitation said that the party would be, but really, it didn't seem to be a party here. I could see some of my friends, carrying some boxes into the house. I went out of my car and went up to my friends. Their faces were shocked. They didn't look too happy to see me. Something told me they were hiding something (reticular formation). For a second we stood there and doing nothing but just breathing (medulla) and looking at each other.
   "What's going on?" I asked.
   "Well, since it's all ruined now," one of my friends said "we'r having a suprise party for you. For your birthday."

defense mechanisms

So this week we learned about defense mechanisms. I think that it's interesting, because it's something we as humans and me as an individual use everyday in our lives. I am especially good at rationalization. Not only do I use it toward other people but also against myself. It ease the disappointment/guilt that comes up when I don't do something. For example I see that there is an activity on the school that I think seems interesting. But I'm sort of shy and insecure, so I don't know if I want to do it alone. So I just make up an excuse, oh well I'm fine without it and don't need to join it. It's not repression, I am aware of that I'm just making it up for myself but it's still easier.

So why do we need these? Why is it so hard for us to deal with the emotions that make us feel uncomfortable? Is it because it's a natural behaviour that we have within us, like the animals or is it something we learn as we grow up? I think it might be both, but I think that what we are more influenced of what we are experience and see in our life. I think so since we are all different and come from different backgrounds. I guess I believe the behavioral perspective on that one. I do believe that we have all of these mechanisms in us from when we get born. But what might be the cause of all of this is that we are lazy and like to take the easy way. It's a little bit like procrastinating, maybe that's what we do all the time, just in different ways. I think we like to live in our perfect little bubble and we do what we can to keep it that way. It is important to know that we have these though and that in the long time we will have to deal with our feelings whehter  we want it or not.

(time published: 10:40 pm)

Blogging Assignment #1

Ok, so I'm Amanda. I am 17 years old and I am an exchange student from Sweden. Next week I've been here for four months... It's scary how time flies. It's hard right now, I'm pretty homesick I guess, but I'm fine though. This fall I've taken up tennis again which was so much fun, and now, I'm on the ski team. I love doing sports here, I really do, it's so much fun and really serious. In spring I'm going to do track I think. At home, I go to upper secondery school, called Marina Laroverket, I guss if you translated that it would be the Marine school. My program is called Leadership and commuincation, we do a lot of physcology, leadership and speech. The main idea is to make sure that people get more confident about themselves and get to know yourself better. Also, since it's a marine school, my class get to go out and sail for a total of 9 weeks over 3 years. It is the best thing ever and I love my school, I really do.

So about psychology, well, I read it back home the entire last year. It's hard to say what I know though, last year we did a lot of experience based learning. We did study theorys of like Freud, the Maslow stair, Johari window and a lot of prespectives. I know a lot of myself, that's the main thing what i learned last year, I can definetly say that I know myself better now, and I understand people around me better. I chose this course because it's very interesting and I think it's fun. I hope that I can learn more about people in general and apply the theories to life in general.